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The Important Distinction Between Unselfishness and Love

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:13

In his sermon titled the Weight of Glory, C.S. Lewis observes the significant shift in the understanding of virtue during modern times. “If you asked twenty good men today what they thought the highest of the virtues, nineteen of them would reply, Unselfishness. But if you asked almost any of the great Christians of old he would have replied, Love.” The shift caught his attention.

His primary concern was that a positive, active virtue (Love) had been replaced by a negative, passive one (Unselfishness). Love pursues the good of others. Unselfishness simply refuses good for ourselves. Unselfishness is certainly an admirable quality in specific moments, but it fails to approach the beauty of genuine love. Love does not force us to abstain from pleasure, but rather finds our chief pleasure in seeking the godly pleasure of others.

An unselfish person might yield the right of way to another person, but would feel no obligation to make sure the other person arrives safely home. The unselfish person might leave the last cookie on the plate, but would not labor to find and serve the person who would be truly blessed by the gift of a cookie. Love does not merely restrain our selfish impulses. It compels us to joyfully sacrifice for the eternal good of our fellow Christians.

The lesson seems important in our striving for unity in the church. By the power of the Spirit we strive to do no harm to our neighbor. And by the power of the same Spirit, we strive to love, serve, enjoy, honor, forgive, and bear with our fellow believers, just as the Lord Jesus Christ lavished these treasures upon us.